Give Up On Me Read online

  “No!” He extended his hands in a gesture to calm her. “He’s alive.”

  She breathed a sigh of relief. “But he was in an accident recently. He sustained severe injury to his brain and has been in a coma for the last three months.”

  Janae burst out crying. She covered her mouth to smother her sobs, but she couldn’t hold them back. Kyler stayed silent and let her cry. After a few minutes, he handed her a few napkins, and she took them with shaking hands.

  “Is he going to be okay?” she whispered. “What did the doctors say?”

  “They said most of the recovery should happen within the first six months. We’re half way through that, but he’s not responding at all. Not to sound or pain or anything.”

  For the first time, his voice broke. All the time she’d known him, Janae had never thought Kyler or his grandmother cared about Matt. He cleared his throat and blinked a few times.

  “His doctor also said that the brain can continue to heal even up to two years.”

  “Two years! He will be in a coma all that time?”

  “No, not necessarily. I’m just saying healing. He could wake up tomorrow and still continue to heal, making improvements. Right now, we don’t know anything about how much damage has been done.”

  “You mean memory loss and movement and all that?”

  He nodded.

  “I appreciate you telling me, Kyler. You didn’t have to, and you had no way of knowing if I still love him.”

  He stared at her. “That’s not the only reason I’m here.”

  Were they going to let her see him? That was too much to hope for, but she would jump at the chance if so. With him in a coma, he would probably never know it. She could feast her eyes on his handsome face and lock it away in her heart before going home to Nerea. The fact that she couldn’t tell Matt about Nerea was killing her as it was.

  “Janae, I want you to get him to wake up.”

  She blinked. “Excuse me?”

  “It’s believed that coma patients can hear the voices of their families. In some cases, it’s the voices of their loved ones that lead them back to consciousness.” His cheeks pinked. “Matt lived the way he did because he loved you, and he couldn’t see his life without you. It’s my belief that he hoped something like this would happen.”

  “You mean he was suicidal?”

  “Not intentionally.”

  “Nobody should love that much. His life is worth something whether I’m in it or not!”

  “True.” His blue gaze flashed resentment at her for an instant and disappeared. “But Matt has always been an extremely passionate person. I agree that he loves you too much.”

  She frowned.

  “And it’s because of his love that I think your voice is the one that will wake him.”

  Janae clutched her fingers together in her lap. She was scared. To see him was one thing, to possibly have him see her, that was a whole other issue. Could she look into those eyes and walk away again? Could she keep the secret about his daughter? Everything inside her said Matt would be the perfect daddy.

  No, his ass would totally spoil Nerea worse than Maria.

  She felt like crying again but held herself together. “I don’t owe you or your family anything. What do you expect of me?”

  “You can’t tell me you don’t want to see him. I can see it in your eyes that you love him.”

  She felt like throwing up in his face. “If you can see that then why the hell are you against us being together?”

  “That’s not the point now, is it?”

  He was still a cold bastard.

  “My idea is for you to come and try to wake Matt. If you succeed, we would like you to work with him.”

  “Work with him? What am I a damn physical therapist?”

  “In this case mental therapist.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “We want you to spend time with him during his recovery and convince him that he can and should live a normal life without you.”

  Janae’s mouth fell open. She would have stormed out of there, but her legs quivered too much. If she stood now, she would fall flat on her face and make a fool of herself in front of this asshole.

  Her silence must have given him the impression she was still considering this preposterous plan.

  “We will fund your living expenses aside from what we’ve given you, but there are other stipulations. You are not to spend the night with him or have sex with him. That’s defeating the purpose of helping Matt to realize a life without you.”

  Janae rested her cheek against one hand. “So you and your grandmother think me and Matt will agree to this bullshit, huh?”

  “I think you will. Matt will go along with whatever boundaries you place on him.”

  “So on one hand you say you believe I love him. On the other, you’re offering me money to manipulate his emotions. That’s rich.”

  He frowned. “I’m not saying manipulate him or get him to feel something he doesn’t feel. I’m saying—”

  “I know what the hell you’re saying. Once again you ignore how we feel—how I feel—and I have to sit up there and stay by the side of the man I love, trying to help him to fall out of love with me. The only way I could possibly follow through was if I continue to love him with everything inside me. You’re asking me to put a knife in my own heart.”

  “Janae.”

  “I don’t matter. All these people around me, everybody needing something from me, but I don’t matter.” She stood. “Go to hell, Kyler.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  What was she doing here? As soon as the nurse left the room, Janae held Matt’s hand and brushed her lips over his skin. She nuzzled his fingers with her cheek and cried some more.

  For the last week, she had been by his bedside, talking to him until her voice grew hoarse. She spent hours with him, encouraging him to wake up, and then she returned home to the apartment where she stayed. The Fousts had paid the rent up for a year, but she missed the Spanish countryside.

  Janae had brought Maria with her on a tourist visa, but Kyler had agreed to use any influence he could to get Maria temporary resident status. She figured they knew about Nerea because they were nosy that way, but Kyler hadn’t mentioned her daughter, and Janae had refused to see Margaret. Not that the old bag was begging for a visit.

  Janae didn’t know why she agreed to this madness at first, but when she turned over Matt’s hand and kissed it, she knew. He was still her world, sharing it with Nerea, but he was firmly there. If she could save him, she would try.

  “Matt, wake up,” she whispered. “Open your eyes. Everyone is worried.”

  As always, his lids fluttered. That was more response than what either Margaret or Kyler got out of him before she arrived. She stood and leaned over him to kiss his cheek. Kyler had said kisses were off limits. If it got Matt to wake up, she’d use it.

  She would use something else, too. Pressing her lips close to his ear, she murmured, “I love you, Matt, and I miss you.”

  He squeezed her hand for the first time, and hope rose in her chest. Tears spilled down her nose and plopped onto his face. She wiped them away gently and sniffed, trying to pull herself together.

  Back in her seat, she drew her feet up onto the chair. “How about I tell you about an old guy I met in…uh…where I lived? His wife said he was a little touched in the head, her expression not mine. The dude was funny. He had a pet chicken, which he walked around on a leash. Yes, can you believe it? It shouldn’t be surprising, I guess, because they were both vegans.”

  Janae droned on, talking about everything and everyone except for Nerea and Maria. She left out Maria because much of her duties involved helping Janae with Nerea. They both tended to cook and clean around the house since Janae had nothing else to do. She told him about her explorations around Valencia without giving the city’s name.

  “The wine they make is incredible. There’s this honey one that I could have drunk like Kool-Aid.” S
he laughed. “I’m kidding. My dad didn’t raise me on Kool-Aid, but I’ve tasted it. Gah!”

  “Ja-nnn.”

  She almost fell out of the chair and looked into his face. Matt looked right back at her, and tears flooded her face. She sobbed. “You’re awake. Matt, are you okay? How are you feeling?”

  She waited for him to open his mouth to speak, but he just stared at her. Then his eyes grew wide, and she saw it coming. His arms swung about, almost hitting her. He tried to rise, but he’d been strapped down. Panic set in, and he moaned, thrashing about.

  “Whoa, Matt. Calm down. It’s all right.”

  He fought her when she tried to grab his hand. She fell back and landed on her ass. Still, he made odd noises as if he couldn’t speak or understand. Fear gripped her chest. Was he brain damaged?

  Janae leaped to her feet and ran out the door. “Somebody please help Matt! Help!”

  Nurses appeared out of nowhere and hurried into the room. Janae followed them. Over the intercom, she heard someone paging Matt’s doctor. One of the nurses walked over to Matt and spoke to him in a soothing tone.

  “It’s all right, Mr. Foust. You’re in a hospital. You’ve been injured, but you’re awake now, and everything’s going to be fine.”

  Matt stopped thrashing, but his face was so pale, Janae wondered if he might pass out. His gaze shifted back and forth between the faces surrounding him. She crept closer, scared to find out the truth. Maybe he didn’t recognize her. Yet, she had heard him try to say her name.

  As soon as Matt looked at her, he stilled. Every muscle in Janae’s body was so tense, she felt like she’d just been in an accident. Her movements jerky, she reached for his hand and held it. “Do you know me, Matt?”

  Confusion settled over his features, and her heart ached. He moved his lips, but only indistinguishable sounds came out. She couldn’t help herself and started to cry. Matt’s fingers tightened on hers.

  “N-no, Ja-nnn.”

  She pressed a hand over her mouth and tried to stymie the tears. Matt’s doctor hurried into the room, and the nurses and Janae moved aside.

  “Well, Mr. Foust, it’s so good to see you’re awake. You had us worried for a little while,” the sixty-something year old man said. “I’m Dr. Yeoman, your attending physician.”

  Janae watched Matt closely while the doctor went through a series of tests and questions for him. Each time, she strained for Matt to start speaking, but it never happened. A short while later when Margaret and Kyler arrived Janae stepped away from the family and Matt’s bed. She didn’t leave the room because she couldn’t stop watching him, telling herself it was good that at least he was awake.

  “Doctor,” Kyler said, “he can’t speak. Does that mean he has brain damage?”

  “Not in the way you’re thinking. The loss of speech and fine motor skills can happen with brain injury, but the extent of it determines whether he will recover both. I’m optimistic that with physical therapy he will make great strides.”

  “Great strides,” Margaret snapped, “is not the same as saying he’ll walk and talk the way he’s supposed to! Tell us plainly.”

  “I’m sorry, Ms. Foust. That’s all I can say at the moment. We will see even in the next few days if he will make progress. Soon, we’ll move him to a rehabilitation facility, and he’ll be assigned a skilled professional to work with him.”

  “He’ll have a private therapist at a private facility,” she argued, and Janae wished she would shut up.

  After the doctor left, Kyler looked around and spotted her. He walked over and took her hand. She blinked at him surprise when he squeezed it. “Thank you, Janae. I knew bringing you here was the right thing to do.”

  Once again she was struck thinking that in his own way Kyler loved Matt. She tugged her hand free of his. “You’re welcome. I guess I’m done and—”

  He shook his head and glanced over his shoulder. With a gesture, he indicated they should step into the hall. She checked on Matt once again and joined him.

  “He’s not out of the woods. You saw how he is, confused and he can’t talk. They haven’t gotten him out of bed, so we don’t know if he can walk.”

  She swallowed. “He has sensation in his feet and legs.”

  “But he might have forgotten how to walk.”

  She shook her head. “No, I won’t believe that.”

  He paced, running his hands over his face. His expression seemed to go from hope to despair and back again. “I’ve been doing some reading on the subject. It’s possible a person injured as badly as Matt was could even forget how to eat.”

  “I don’t want to hear that!”

  When she swayed, he laid a hand on her arm. “You’ve been here hours every day, far more than my grandmother and I have been. Plus, you have a young child at home.”

  She started. Kyler continued as if his admission was no big deal. She’d suspected it but having him confirm took her by surprise. Presuming his next words would an order to keep her mouth shut about the baby, she didn’t catch what he actually said.

  “I’m sorry. What?”

  “Your role isn’t over. Remember, we agreed you would convince him that he can live his life without you, a happy life with purpose.”

  “I said I would try. There’s a difference. Besides, he can’t even speak. I’m not sure he knows me or understands what we’re saying.”

  Kyler looked at her for long minutes, and she had the feeling he knew what she so desperately needed to hear. “He knows you, Janae.”

  He opened the door to Matt’s room again. Margaret leaned over Matt, frowning at him. “I can’t understand you. Try to take your time and say it slowly.”

  How much more slowly can he say it?

  “Ja-nnn-aaaeee.”

  Kyler glanced at her and entered the room. After a beat, Janae followed. As soon as Matt spotted her, some of the confusion cleared from his expression. He moved his hand an inch or two in her direction, and she hurried forward to take it in hers. Her heart longed to pull him close and feel the warmth of his body, but she made do with holding his hand.

  Margaret cast her resentful glances, which she ignored and spoke to Matt.

  “It’s me, Matt. Do you remember?” Janae said.

  His lips twitched, and he repeated her name slow and drawn out.

  “That’s enough for today,” Margaret growled. “He’s tired.”

  She tried shoving Janae aside, but Matt thrashed in his bed, moaning and trying to get to her. Kyler stepped in. “Stop, Margaret. He obviously wants to keep her here for now. Just let him adjust.”

  “He needs his family,” Margaret said, “not her.”

  “She woke him,” Kyler said, “not us.”

  Janae wasn’t crazy enough to believe Kyler was on her side now, but she was grateful for every second she got to stay close to Matt. Now that he had awakened, who knew how long she had before they would try to force her to go away again.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Six months later…

  The barbells clinked together as Matt and his physical therapist laid them down on the floor. Matt panted, and sweat rolled down the side of his face, but he never complained. His blue gaze shifted from the next set of exercises he was performing to lock on her.

  “Matt, you have to keep your head in the game on this one, bud,” the therapist told him. “Or we could both wind up in trouble. Come on, man, push it.”

  “Give me a break for a minute,” Matt said.

  The therapist glanced from Matt to Janae and sighed. “Okay, five.”

  As soon as he left the room, Matt stood, using his cane, to approach her.

  “You should be resting.”

  “Janae.” His brilliant eyes on her sent chills down her back and brought goose bumps to her arms. She tried not to rub them and bring attention to his affect on her. Every chance the man got he spoke her name. Progress on making him change his mind about her? Yeah, right.

  “I told you I wouldn’t come if you do
n’t concentrate.” That was another problem she had. She couldn’t use herself as a reward for him behaving. Yet, she had no other ideas. What she had was Kyler breathing down her neck wanting results. She had fed Matt when he couldn’t eat by himself and helped him form words when his therapist wasn’t around.

  He dropped down beside her on the cushioned bench she occupied. “How can I concentrate when you look so good and you smell…” He leaned in closer, but she ducked away. His eyes danced with joy. “…good enough to eat.”

  “Matt, stop. I told you I’m only here to help you through your recovery. You’re almost all better, and in a little while, I’m sure you’ll be given the clear to go back to work.”

  “A little while is an eternity. I’m bored.”

  “So that’s why you’re looking at me. Well, I’m not your entertainment.” She started to rise, but he grabbed her wrist. She was startled to find so much strength in his hold. Not too long ago, he’d been as weak as Nerea.

  “No, you’re right. You’re not my entertainment. You’re the woman I love, and I’m doing all I can to win you.”

  She blinked at him. He couldn’t be so blind as to not know how she felt.

  Matt smirked. “I know you love me. What’s not to love?”

  “Funny.”

  He winked. Those fine motor skills were certainly on track. “I have you here.”

  He pointed to her chest, and she smacked his hand away.

  “I’m trying to help you to understand up here.” He brushed fingertips over her left temple. “That you and I belong together.”

  She looked down and fiddled with her purse. “That’s not an option.”

  “Says who?”

  She heaved her shoulders and raised her chin. “Says me. Whatever affection I feel for you doesn’t matter. I’ve decided I don’t want to be with you, and you need to decide that you can live without me. Don’t try those ridiculous stunts I heard you were pulling after I left.”

  She always waited for him to either say he wouldn’t be doing anything crazy anymore, or at least to say he would risk everything for her. He never said anything when she made that speech, which drove her insane. The only thing she was sure of was that he loved her. Where his head was—a whole other mystery.